These are some of the most bizarre and hilarious moments from the Yakuza franchise that amused players in unexpectedly eccentric ways. While this franchise tells emotional stories that raise questions in the players’ minds, one of the reasons for their immense popularity in recent times is the almost surreal humor.
In order to keep the list varied, the same game will not be included twice. And there are no major spoilers for the game’s narrative as far as the main storyline is concerned.
Yakuza 0 – Turkey
Yakuza 0 is set at Christmas time, and in one substory, a nice, pleasant woman makes a fine deal with Kiryu. If he achieves three strikes in bowling, the girl, whose name is Emiri, agrees to give him a turkey that’s delicious and plump. It’s the Christmas season, so this is the perfect reward.
After completing the said objective of achieving three strikes, she offers Kiryu the turkey. At this moment, Kiryu closes his eyes, smiles, and utters “Mmm, a turkey”. However, once he opens his eyes, he sees a chicken who’s quite alive. Emiri gifts Kiryu a live chicken instead of a turkey that could be eaten.
Obviously, this confuses and angers the young man, but only for a while. He develops a fondness for the chicken and names him “Nugget”. After the substory is completed, you can assign Nugget as a manager for your real estate business. Yeah.
Yakuza Kiwami – “Passionate Manly Bathhouse Battle”
This is about a CD with a very misleading and suspicious name. It’s basically a video where Kiryu can learn new fighting moves and it’s a reference to a boss fight in Yakuza Ishin!
Anyway, Kiryu goes to a shop that sells videotapes and asks for this CD, only for Majima to hear him. As you might know, Majima stalks Kiryu in Yakuza Kiwami and it’s painful to both the player and Kiryu at certain points. He misunderstands this “Passionate Manly Bathhouse Battle” thing and uses it to provoke Kiryu into fighting him.
Yakuza Kiwami 2 – Be My Baby
This substory is absurd and unbelievable. A Yakuza patriarch offers Kiryu a chance to join him on a visit to a club. I’ll get straight to the point. This “club” is a place where these middle-aged men get dressed as babies (in diapers and all) and enjoy being treated like babies by women…
The first time I encountered this quest, I couldn’t even laugh. It’s so surprising and I don’t know if this is a thing in real life.
Anyway, the patriarch has a habit of forcing everyone to wear diapers and join him in enjoying the company of the ladies who act as their mothers. Kiryu obviously dislikes this idea and the case ends with a brawl.
In the end, however, the patriarch understands that he shouldn’t force his strange kinks on others, and he becomes friends with Kiryu. It’s a great substory.
Yakuza: Like A Dragon – The Crawfish
Another insanely bizarre substory, this is a rather sweet story, in all honesty. Ichi finds a crawfish on a bridge that looks rather lonely, and he does it a favor by throwing it into the water. However, this crawfish belonged to an old homeless man who’d named her Nancy and considered her a pet. He expresses his sadness and frustration and Ichiban finds Nancy again and brings her to the man.
Unfortunately, the homeless man tells Ichiban that he’s going to eat Nancy for dinner. Like Kiryu in Yakuza 0, Ichi had developed a fondness for the crawfish and protested that she mustn’t be eaten. Naturally, the man agrees and hands Nancy over. Ichiban gains a new, unusual friend who’s adept in combat.
